Perks of the Job

After 188 child-years (sort of like man-hours) of motherhood/grand-motherhood you learn a trick or two:

• Always have chewing gum or Lifesavers in your purse to use as a bribe
• Always have wet wipes along to clean up after bribery
• Even children with impeccable manners can only sit still for a limited amount of time
• Figure one minute per year of age
• Crayons go a long way to extending the impeccable manners of children.

When folks are visiting the dealership, they frequently bring their children along. This way they can check things like these:

• Ease of carseat installation
• Legroom
• Sight lines for youngsters
• If your child gets carsick, chances are he/she can't see out.
• Convenience of preventing "Stop touching me! He's touching me!"
• Ability to reach children with Goldfish Crackers, Lifesavers, and/or wet wipes.

We had a visit from a delightful little family: Mom, Dad, Daughter, and Son. Perfect. The kids were delightful, well-behaved little people, but they were starting to get bored. Being the motherly types, I whipped out the crayons while Alicia got the helium balloons.

Today is one of those days I could tell the boss to keep the check; I've been paid.

Special thanks to my new little friends!